October 2010

When we become mothers it seems that a switch is automatically flipped that changes our mindset from "me" to "everyone else" Our daily shower becomes weekly, our 8-hours of recommended sleep becomes "I'll nap when the baby naps - if I'm lucky," the food we eat is whatever is left over on our child's plate and that free time we spent with our husbands, friends, family or by-our-selves has become obsolete. In the hustle and bustle that is motherhood, we start to forget who we are. The individual that used to paint, or write, or do yoga has become buried beneath the dirty diapers, baby bottles, and laundry. We as mothers, wives, and women need to remember that making time for ourselves and reconnecting with who we are is the best thing we can do for not only ourselves, but for those around us.
Take a moment and think back to the most recent day where you spent every waking, unscheduled moment doing everything for those around you and nothing for yourself. Were you happy and rejuvenated or sad and exhausted? When we take the time each day, even just 30 minutes, to give ourselves a much needed break, we become vastly different people than on the days that we don't. A late evening bath may lead to a romantic rendezvous with your husband, rather than a grade school fight over what to watch on television. A mid-afternoon nap could quite easily make way for cuddling on the couch watching movies verses falling asleep, still in that day's clothes, at 8 p.m. on a Friday night. A solo walk on a sunny fall morning becomes the perfect ingredient to an afternoon of playing hid-and-seek and Cooties, with the children who moments earlier were on a one-way trip to the moon. It doesn't have to be anything major, simply recognize when you're running on empty and take the time to fill up your tank.
name something you use to do before you became a mom. How about before you became a wife? Is there a reason you can no longer do these things? The reason you give better be health related otherwise...there's no excuse. That 30 minute break we talked about earlier would be the perfect time to delve into the box labeled "what I use to do for fun," you know, the one you pushed into the back corner of the attic? The box filled with downhill skis, a sewing machine, a visitor's guide of Italy, a screenplay about that crazy dream you once had, running shoes, a college brochure, or maybe even a slide trombone. There is no reason you can't bring that box down from the attic, reminisce about the "good 'old days.
' and then introduce that passion and yourself to your children. Share with them those things that make you happy. Instill within your children the desire to explore, perform, or create. Let them see beyond the exhaustion of the daily grind, and into your soul; into the place that drives you,k that gives you passion, and that makes you who you are.
Did we recognize our needs and cater them, or ignore them to cater others? Did we leave behind a dream, for the dreams of our children or did we live our dream to encourage our children to live theirs? Remembering to make time for ourselves and to reconnect with who we are is the best thing we an do for not only ourselves, but our children. Because, in the end how we live our lives will greatly impact how our children live their lives.